Success Should be Measured by Intent

“My failures have been errors in judgment, not of intent.”

-Ulysses S. Grant

Failure is as much a part of life as success; they live within a beautiful, symbiotic relationship as much a part of the world as an up and a down.  The very fact that the word success is even definable is because the word failure sits at its doorstep.  In life it’s inevitable to experience as much failure as you do success, where I think most people get the wrong idea is that success should be determined by an end product as opposed to its by products that came from our original intent.  Success means so much more than arriving at a desired end point, it means having the courage to even take the first steps towards a point.  The Lao Tzu put it beautifully when it stated that “A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving.”  If we can wrap our minds around this simple concept then the act of living a successful life will be easier to manifest.

Like everything else in life, success is determined by the measuring stick we use to define it.  In my life I have suffered many defeats, defeats of character, in sports, as a writer, as a philosopher, as a friend, and in a more general sense as a human being.  But when I started to look deeper into these failures that have crept into my life, I started to have my eyes opened to the fact that these were not failures because I thought they were, they were failures because I let others give them that definition.  You must be very careful about letting others define your efforts, for other people have no idea the reason for any of your attempts.  The part of success and failure that I find most interesting is the intent that goes before the actions are taken.  Why give anyone else the ability to define your life for you, when it’s so much more fun living out your definition for yourself and letting your life be an evolving definition that speaks for the success itself?

Behind every action we take is the intent for the action.  Behind every choice we make is a motivation inside of us for making that choice.  When the world judges our actions it so often doesn't have enough knowledge of our intent to make a proper judgment, so don’t sweat the outcome of things as much as you take stock in the action itself.

Let’s say you have a friend who is in love with their significant other, and you catch that significant other cheating on your friend.  You know it will devastate your friend if you tell him/her, and it might even end your friendship with that person because they might not believe you.  You decide to tell your friend what you saw anyways because your intent is to be a loving person who doesn't want to hide the truth.  Upon telling them the news of betrayal your friend gets angry and decides not to believe you.  Even further than not believing you your friend decides to no longer be friends with you.  The outcome of this decision would appear a failure to the outside world but in your eyes it was a success because you feel at peace with the decision and you did what you thought was right.  Your intent was pure in this matter so the end result is not what was important; it was the journey of being a loving friend that was a success.  You can see in just this one, simple scenario, how intent is what should be valued over the perceived failure in an outcome.

I’ll give you another example where your intent can be the reason for failure or success.  In the same scenario from above if you take a slightly different vantage point you can see how failure is born.  Let’s say you saw your friend’s significant other cheating and you decide that it’s better to let your friend find out on their own because he/she needs to be taught a lesson about not trusting people; despite not wanting this to be the case for you in the same situation.  Your intent is to have life teach someone else a lesson that’s not rooted in love, and thus the failure takes root.  Your friend inevitably finds out that he/she is being cheated on and consequently finds out that you knew all along.  This knowing leads to he/she ending your friendship on entirely different grounds, entirely warranted grounds, for you can no longer be trusted as an honest person.  Same end result, a lost friendship, a failure by the world’s eyes.  But because of the intent you entered into the scenario with you have no sense of success; you failed miserably at being a good friend.

In both scenarios you can see how the intent of the person is what comes into question, and in both scenarios you can see how the outcome can either be one of harmony born from intent or one of disharmony bred from intent.

On the great walk of life the only real judge of success can be your intent on living.  If you make your way through life poor and unwanted in the eyes of man, but your intent in life was to be a pure spirit with pure intentions and you chose accordingly, which only lead to the end result of lack in the material sense, I see you as a success.   On the flip side, if you die very wealthy and powerful because your intent in life was to exploit others for the building up of your own ends, then I see you as a failure.  The acquisition of wealth is neutral,  it's only paper, the manner in which it's acquired is what someone can be deemed a failure or success by.  

We are all born naked and without a single object to our names, and we all die the same way, for we can’t carry anything with us past the grave.

If your intent on anything you do is pure then failure is not an option worth exploring, for your intent is the primary ingredient of success regardless the outcome.  Your intent is all that you have to warrant any decision you make in life; pure intentions are what separates the beast of man from the lamb of God.  When your intentions are pure and righteous you will learn that the end result is not always what warrants the judgment of success or failure, but it was the journey itself that produced the success your life will be judged by.

I know this idea is rather ethereal and does not always produce the financial means which you might desire but it will produce the person you desire to be.  In life when you know you are the person you want to be, all the gold in the world alter change this fact.  But the man who does not know who he is cannot buy his wanted definition with any amount of gold.  At the end of the day the person of pure intent will be happier and more fulfilled because intent is not for sale, it’s given freely, and we can’t go to the grave with gold but we can go to the grave with a pure heart and a pure mind.

Your intentions in a matter and not the outcome should be what define success in your life.

Return to Sender

Sometimes in life we come across someone else who does more than take our breath away, they somehow manage to show us how important that breath we have really is.  This can be a lover or a friend or just a random stranger who talks to us in such a way that it reminds us that living is really important.  I am here to attest to the fact that this phenomenon is paramount to not only being human but in knowing what it means to be alive. 

When you meet this kind of individual it’s important to be as real as possible so that no intention is mistaken for anything other than true and honest gratitude for their existence.   It’s also extremely important to give to this person that which you desire most for yourself, namely kindness. 

Love can come in many forms:  from the exchange of a kiss, a handshake of reassurance, to a hug that depicts your mutual trust.  Love and affection are not givens in this world, at least not in the way that most people think.  Love and affection are in need of nothing, they’re perfect in and of themselves, and neither requires a return to sender.  Love is an action and an emotion, it’s a noun and a verb, and it’s not something that can be taken for granted because it exists solely within itself for definition.

You don’t have to exhibit an undying need for another individual for that person to understand that they’re important, you just have to be there in the moment and show a desire to be willing to exchange their gift of affection in whichever way suits you best. 

To feel needed is a travesty in our society but to feel important is a gift that goes beyond words to describe.

If you have someone in your life that you feel is worth your time and attention, do me a favor, grab them up and tell them, regardless of how silly it may feel for you to do so or regardless of what their reaction is. 

Give your love not freely but openly when the opportunity presents itself and hide not in the comfort of past habits but instead look to see your beauty in the eyes of that person who can see you for who you really are.

Love is an action and a noun, so next time you wonder how you should react to another’s kindness think only to how you would react to feeling love course through your bones if you were to feel it for the first time.  Trust in your instinct to give to another and you’ll have figured out that a real friendship is only born through being different than most, and that a real friendship is only born when we lose ourselves in the opportunity of finding love in another.

Shades of Perspective

“What we see in life depends on the filter of our lens.”

-Mason Wooldridge

For many people life seems to be a game without many choices, without hope, without joy, without love, and without a consistent direction or path to follow.  But this is true for only one reason: because these same people have chosen to believe this.  Life is what we desire it to be, it’s forever what we choose it to be, and it all boils down to how we view the world around us; for what we see in life depends on the filter of our lens.

Above is a picture which shows a rock from three distinct viewpoints, all of which shed a different light on the same rock.  For each picture I used a different filter on the lens of my camera phone to capture a different perspective of the same reality.  In no way are these three pictures not showing the same exact rock, but in every way they show the uniqueness and complexity of the rock from different angles of light and effect.  Even in a simple rock there is truth and wisdom to be found if you but first choose to acknowledge this fact.

If we can see the variations of the rock in these pictures, capturing in each picture a different definition of what the rock appears to be, think about how many ways we can view our own life and its ever-changing complexity.

How many times have you looked at someone, initially judging that person, only to realize that your initial assumptions were way off base?

If we can choose to see a simple rock in so many different ways, why can’t we choose to see the world around us in a different way?

Why does life have to be how you currently see it?  What’s stopping you from seeing life differently?  What’s stopping you from looking at the world around you through a more beneficial lens?

We live our lives how we choose to live them, life doesn’t just happen by chance, it’s always a direct result of our thinking about it and our mental projections upon it.  Everything we think, say, and do, is a choice we make in accordance with how we view our current circumstances.

If life is not what you want it to be, maybe it’s because you’re the one holding progress back.  Maybe it’s your current lens and filter of vision that’s stopping you from having a better existence. 

In order to see life differently you have to start training yourself to be different, to act different, to think different, and to believe that there is immense beauty and perfection in all that you’re currently choosing not to see.

There's a whole other world out there waiting for you to notice it.

Peace and Love my friends,

-Mason   

The Meaning of Life

“For the meaning of life differs from man to man, from day to day and from hour to hour. What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person's life at a given moment.”

-Viktor E. Frankl

When one thinks about the meaning of life there are so many questions that come to mind and with every question that pops up a myriad of answers are sure to follow.  So where is a good starting point when looking to tackle this monumental question?  Where is a good ending point?  And furthermore, where do I even get the authority to tackle such a question?  If you bear with me I’m sure you will find at least some of the answers you seek.

First, a starting point:  Why were we created in the first place? 

I think it all boils down to experience, ours and our creators, and their co-dependence.  If you were to stop for a second and think about the implications of life and the laws that govern those implications I think you’ll begin to see that experience is what unites us all and it’s our shared experience that makes up what some are calling the “collective conscious.”  This collective conscious is what many believe is the heartbeat of the creator, and since we’re the ones causing this heart to beat then we are all connected not only with one another but also with that which created us.  So it makes sense that in order for a creator to fully experience who the creator is then we have to live out all of our experiences consciously or unconsciously, collectively.  If I was not who I was, going through what I’m going through, then someone, somewhere, would not be able to experience who that person is relative to myself.  We all need other people to define who it is we are, and it’s through our experiences that we gain insight into just who that person is.  Think about it, were it not for another person in your life would you be able to define who it is you are?  It’s because of everyone that we can put a name to ourselves; because we all can claim ourselves as independents it’s obvious to me that through shared experience we are able to fully define the lot of us.  If we were not all to live on this planet in order to experience independent parts of a unified life, then what definition would we be able to give to life, to ourselves, or to a creator?  When I look at someone else I see aspects of humanity that define something other than who it is I am, I also see very similar characteristics that could unite us as one body if we needed them to.  So to answer the question posed at the start of this paragraph in very plain terms, we were created to experience whatever it is we choose to experience.  Our first purpose in life is to live so that we can experience all that living has to offer.  Because of this revelation it leads me to another pertinent question…

Can we choose to experience anything we want?

The short answer is YES!  Please do, please choose to experience any aspect of life that you so desire, it’s what makes life interesting.  Nothing is off limits, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t consequences for our actions.  Don’t forget that there are some rules that we must all play by in the game of life, and one of them is that every action has an equal or opposite reaction.  I believe that nothing is off limits to us, made obvious by our ability to choose to do whatever we want, however, some choices will not produce a positive or desired result.  Since we can choose to do anything in life then it makes sense to me that everything we desire to experience is here for us to choose to do.  I do not believe in a universal “right and a wrong” in the accepted sense of the words; instead I believe in right and wrong being only definable and contingent upon our singular existence.  What’s right for me may not be right for you, and likewise, what’s wrong for you may not be wrong for me; that’s the beauty of life and where many people lose their way.  Just because something is wrong for you and not for another does not mean you have the right to make another person acquiesce to your definition of the truth.  If more people would live life according to their own barometers for right and wrong, without holding judgment upon the heads of others for not choosing the same definition, this world would be a much more beautiful place to live.  Even in the chaos of defining what’s right and wrong we have the ever-evolving experience of life to take into account.  Whatever may seem right or wrong to you today will not hold the same value a decade from now, so how can you justify judging another person based on the choices they make right now?  Live to be an example of what you believe right and wrong to be, but try not to live to be a tyrant for your beliefs.  From this idea we can draw upon my last point to be made…

Are we judged for our actions?

By a creator, a.k.a. God, no; by other people, you bet we are.  Many of you are probably strongly disagreeing with me right now because you believe the role of God is to create then judge his creation right?  “But Mason, my religion has told me for years that judging was the role of God and that we’re all sinners that need to be forgiven for our actions in order to get to this place called Heaven.”  Have you ever taken a minute to think that maybe your religion is wrong, I’m not talking about the lessons they preach but the overall declaration of needing to be forgiven for some reason?  Why would God, this omnipotent being, ever need to punish us for anything, in what world does that even make sense?  And for what reason would we be punished, especially for making a simple choice?  Does God need anything?  Isn’t God without need, or want, or desire?  I believe so, for the simple belief that God wants anything means that he lacks something… that doesn't mesh right?  The same people that will disagree with my statement are the same people that believe God created us and knows all about every choice we will ever make.  But if God knew every choice we were ever to make before our birth, including the “negative” ones, and still created us only to judge us because of them, that’s not really God, that’s a childish dictator, and also a being made up by superstition and misunderstanding of the word LOVE.  Every choice available to us was made by God, meaning that every choice is part of the ultimate reality of God, so how could any choice be any less “God” then another?  Think about it… let all of your bias towards a religion leave your mind for a minute and really think about it.  I could write thousands of words on this idea alone, but for the sake of this thought I want to just end by saying that we are not judged by God, based on our choices, but we will be judged by man based on what we choose to do.  Man is fickle, God is not, so don’t worry about the judgment of others when you have faith in your intentions.  Life will end where life began, with a re-connection to the source.

To wrap this up I feel it important to state one last time what I started this thought with, the reason why we’re all here, the meaning of life:  To experience as much of life as possible.

I AM WHAT I AM

"I am the greatest.  I said that even before I knew I was."

-Muhammad Ali

I AM WHAT I AM.

This statement is both the saving grace for mankind and its greatest, misunderstood statement.

So often in life we hear someone say as a means of justification for something, “I am what I am,” but the same people that make this proclamation rarely understand the power that’s found within the words. 

This statement is quite possibly the most powerful combination of words in the English language.  Let’s take a closer look at the implications of such a statement and why this combination of words can either be the downfall of a person or their greatest accomplishment.

Normally when someone says “I am what I am,” they’re saying it as an excuse for not being who someone thinks they should be; this statement is normally reserved for the context of making an excuse for a lack of effort or self-control. 

When I think of the situation that this phrase is most commonly used in I think of someone being questioned for a behavior they’re exhibiting, usually being one of negative connotation.  For example: when someone’s significant other catches them cheating, or catches them doing something that seems very out of character.  This phrase is primarily used at the end of a relationship or at the beginning of what could have been a friendship or meaningful relationship.  “I am what I am” carries a lot of negative residue because people through the ages have lost the knowledge and understanding of the power that can be found within this statement.

Let’s break down the first part of this statement so I can show you what I think it means…

I AM:  This portion of the phrase which makes up the first two words of the statement and the last two words of the statement is the meat of its meaning.  “I AM” carries the bulk of the weight here, it also carries the most residual energy from our past.  When you attack this phrase as something that defines a person because of their past then you've overlooked the underlying meaning of these words.  I AM is an ever-evolving, living and breathing statement of how things are for us, it’s alive in three succinct yet unifying parts… I AM me today, I AM me from yesterday, and I AM me for tomorrow.  In just these two words we see that the statement I AM has a threefold meaning:  past, present, and future.  I AM a product of my past decisions; I AM the product of my current environment, I AM the sum of my future choices… I AM ME.  

In all ways this phrase of “the great I AM” is evolving, fluctuating, and redefining.  Once we come to grips with the living nature of these two words we can begin to see just how powerful the phrase as a whole can be.

The key to understanding the significance of the phrase ‘I am what I am,” is to understand that it is not a final definition of who you are at any given moment, but a phrase that defines who you can be at any given moment.

If you believe this phrase limits the definition of who you are, think again.  This phrase is literally exploding with nothing more than endless possibility.  This phrase at its root level is the embodiment of who we are as a person… limitless.

Let’s take a look at the scenario from the beginning I referred to where someone is caught cheating on their significant other and when approached about it their retort is ‘I am what I am.”  In this case it seems like a cop-out huh?  What needs to come into account here is not after the deed of cheating is done, but the very act of cheating itself.  If this person who cheated thought for any moment that they were indeed not a cheater, then the action of cheating would never take place.  When you don’t know who you are you leave your life open for other people to define it.  If you know what I AM as faithful, if you make this choice to know yourself as faithful then why would you ever cheat?  Knowing who you are can be defined as the choices you make and the motivation behind them.  You are constantly making statements to the universe about who you are by the choices you make, but how often do you reaffirm to yourself the definition of “you?”

The very act of choosing who you are on a constant basis is the limit to which the power of this statement can hold for you.  When you realize that who you are is up to you and always open for rediscovery you can begin to let go of past programming that no longer suits your grandest vision of yourself.  Past heartaches, past trials, past bad decisions, your family, your hometown, they all become just another set of choices for how you NOW choose to define yourself.  Will you in this moment of now allow the sins of your father define you as a man today, or will you choose a definition that better fits who it is you desire to be?  When you see this phrase as the great liberator put into words, you begin to let go of the past issues that haunt your being and you begin to grow into the being that lies dormant inside all of us: a being of limitless potential, capable of moving mountains if need be.

When you believe that you are who you choose to be you see that the statement goes from “I am what I am” to “I am what I choose I am.”  How amazing is that to think about?  How powerful is that thought?…

I guess it’s as powerful as you choose to believe it is right?

This statement is freeing, it’s living, it’s limitless, it’s you at your greatest, or you at your least.  The statement “I am what I am” is your key to success and happiness beyond your wildest dreams. 

Be who you know you can be, be who you want to be, be who you choose to be. 

Think about these words and let them pierce the armor of your soul, for if you don’t you just might be someone else tomorrow who gives up control over your life, or one who gets caught telling someone for the worst possible reason, “I am what I am.”

What is Your Mission Statement?

Before we can really dive into the topic of mission statements, their importance, and how to form one, we need to have a good, working definition of just what a mission statement is…  Wikipedia defines a mission statement as: A mission statement is a statement of the purpose of a company, organization or person, its reason for existing.

For the purpose of this thought I want to focus on the personal aspect of a mission statement, why it’s important to have one, and the heightened sense of purpose that one can gleam from making one to fit their life.  The website, eHow.com, put it perfectly in their response to the question: what is a mission statement:

“A personal mission statement is a written culmination of values, roles, objectives, and self-reflection and self-evaluation. It has the flexibility to change as you change and the ability to keep you focused when you travel down a path that is not acceptable to your own morals and values. Creating a personal mission statement is the first step to a life of success and satisfaction, and anybody with a little time can create one.” By James G. Pradke, eHow Contributor

It’s very common in life to go through your days, your weeks, months, and the years of your life without every really knowing why you’re living, or for that matter, what you’re living for.  What a mission statement can do for you is give you focus and direction towards being a certain kind of person, and it can keep you in line with your highest ideals that you hold about yourself.

In a world where we as people are constantly being pushed from here to there without as much as a thank you from our calendars, it’s growing increasingly important to be able to say “no” to things that conflict with what we want most.  But what happens to the person who doesn’t know who they are or what they stand for?  They get lost in the commotion of life; they grow old and die, and all without reaching their full potential as a human being.

Have you ever wanted to be able to say no to certain things in life and yes to more of what you’d really like to explore?  Have you ever had the sinking suspicion that you were made for more than your current day-to-day?..  A mission statement can help you answer those questions and it can simultaneously help direct the course your life takes from the minute you create your own.

If you don’t stand for something as a person you will inevitably fall for anything.  If you are not grounded in an ideal or a desire in your life, then the wind will be all that’s needed to dissuade you from any course of action, worthwhile or not.

I found that by setting a mission statement for my life I was instantly aligned with what meant most to me, plus it made it a lot easier to say no to people and circumstances that did not align with my statement.

In order for your mission statement to be powerful it needs to be clear and concise, no more than a few sentences, and as much as possible, direct and to the point of your purpose and existence.  For example:  To live a fun life in accordance with my beliefs and values at any given time, and use my talents to add value to my environment in ways that I choose.  Kurt Schmitt (http://www.inspirational-sayings-in-action.com/sample-mission-statement.html) As you can see it doesn’t take many words to start focusing you towards being the person you were meant to be.

My mission statement is as follows:  Choose love and acceptance over everything.  Be the light for others to follow.  Never let someone else define how I view myself.  Your mission statement can be almost anything you want it to be, it can be more broad, or more concise, but in the end it needs to be powerful enough to guide your steps in all occasions. 

The beautiful thing about a personal statement of definition is that it can be done for any aspect of your life, but I believe that the most powerful statements are those that encompass your life in a nut-shell.  The thing to remember here is that you should be totally honest with yourself and the direction of your life, you need to be one with the statement you make or else it won’t be able to serve a true guide.

Once you have established your statement you can base everything you do and say on it.  If someone asks something of you that doesn’t fit your statement about yourself then you have the ability to say no to them, and feel good about saying no. 

A good mission statement will provide you with all the motivation you need to be successful in whatever pursuits you take on.  There’s one thing you must remember though:  life is in a constant state of change and evolution, so be open to allowing your mission statement to change with you as you grow into a different person with different views as time goes on. 

Let your statement be a light in your life that gives direction and motivation; a good personal statement should never limit what you want to experience in life, it should only be a bridge from who it is you are to who it is you know you desire to be.

Once you make your own statement, memorize it and say it out loud as much as possible; make sure the Universe knows just who it’s now dealing with.  The act of saying something out loud sends energy out into the Universe so that who you really want to be can start becoming a reality.

You might find that the statement you come up with does not vibe with how other people see you, that’s perfectly okay…  How often are we truly honest with other people about who we really are?  You’ll find that if you start living by your mission statement the people around you will never second guess who it is that you are again.

Thankfulness is a State of Mind

The key to happiness in this life is simple: enjoy the small moments when they present themselves.

We as people are constantly being bombarded by influences outside of our internal nature, whether it be from the media, the demands of everyday life, bills needing to be paid or friends and family pulling at our attention strings.

We so constantly look around at the world and desire feelings of happiness or completeness, we do this so often that we can actually forget to stop and appreciate all of life’s little blessings along the way.

Whether it is a sunrise or a sunset, the soft breeze blowing against our face, the smell of flowers, the smile someone gives us, leaves falling around us, certain melodies in a song, and the list goes on and on; the Universe is always trying to direct us back to a state of knowing who we really are, it’s always giving us opportunities to be one with our true nature. 

The gifts of life often come in small packages and when we’re not really paying attention.  I think one of the biggest secrets in life is that we are always connected to everything and everyone around us, it just takes a deep breath and a ready heart to see this as a fact.

We were not made to be drones or lifeless beings that merely exist in a rat wheel of life.  We were made as creative beings with endless potential for love and prosperity; it’s when we forget this about our true nature that we start taking all of life’s little moments for granted.

Yesterday I was walking out to the meadow at our house to cut some firewood when along my first couple of steps out of the front door a little leaf fell from a tree and landed in my hand.  What a marvelous moment this was for me, but its meaning would have been lost if I wasn't ready to see its meaning..

As the leaf fell and landed in my palm I was reminded about how perfect everything around us is, how unique but perfect everything fits together.  For that leaf to fall at the moment it did, for it to die at the precise moment it took for it to fall, and for the wind to accurately have it land in my hand was perfection in an instant.  If I failed to realize at that exact moment what it took for this to happen I would have missed out on the universe quietly whispering in the ear of my soul: "we are all connected." 

The fact that we are part of this world and that this world is a part of us is what some would refer to as a divine dichotomy.  If you take a minute to stop throughout your day and let life bless you, you’ll be more ready to bless other people along the path of their day as well.

The leaf falling into my hand stopped me in my tracks and reminded me that the end result of going into the woods to cut some firewood was not the blessing, but the power of the moment was in the actual walk into the woods.  The journey of our lives is what melds us with our true being and our real potential.  It’s what we do when no one sees us that define our true character.  It’s what we take for granted or what we hold as precious moments in time that speak the loudest for our worth and our true nature.

The small moments in life that show us our true connection to everything around us add up to making us the person we truly desire to be.  If we can’t appreciate the little things that cross our path, how will we be able to truly be thankful for the major blessings?

If you allow the minute in detail to permeate your exterior and melt into your interior you’ll be much more content in this world.  Every small blessing serves to re-connect us and resurface the truth about who we are in this world.  Let the small blessings mount up, be present in all moments and your perspective on life will naturally start to change into one that is appreciative and positive.

If you find yourself being negative about life and the lot it has served you, look no further than to change the thoughts you have about your own life.  Keep an eye out for the small treasures; keep your eyes open for the beauty and connectivity that's all around you. 

Don’t allow yourself to be lost in the matrix, instead force yourself to acknowledge that you are the creator of your own matrix.

We are only as happy as the blessings we allow ourselves to receive.